Remember the ads about some things being priceless? “There are some things money can’t buy. For everything else, there’s Mastercard.” No matter what card we use or how we feel about credit in general, it was an effective campaign. And there was something to the message—some things are priceless.

In closing out the second year of this blog – this being the 24th post—and closing out 2025, I want to go boldly past the dollars and cents, the credit scores, mortgage rates, budgets and investments, and take a look at dollars and sense, with sense referring to why personal financial “success” is important beyond the numbers in our bank account.

Financial wellness means something different to all of us, and that’s a good thing. I don’t teach personal finance with “get rich”, “make a zillion bucks”, or “retire wealthy” as blanket ideals. I try to help folks learn how to manage their finances within an unruly and complicated system so that they can pursue their goals, whether that means building wealth, changing generational perspectives about money, or finding a way to do meaningful work without worrying about how much it pays. Again, our system is messy and loaded with potholes, and even if your goals are non-financial, it takes financial savvy to get there.

And that’s all very personal. For me, financial wellness has categories and milestones, some with $$ but not all. The example I offer today is about walking my kid to school.

(I Didn’t Know) The Impact of Better Money Decisions

When I began to rewrite my personal finance story, I was thinking about my future self, but mostly if not wholly in the context of building up my bank account, probably for the purpose of what it could buy me later in life. Not bad. And the future me stuff was right on target. But what I didn’t know at the time (or didn’t think about) was that a day would come when a stronger financial foundation would be used to fund choices that ultimately have nothing to do with money and are in fact priceless.

This is an excerpt from an essay I wrote a few years ago, highlighting (and counting) the time I was able to spend walking my son to school.

Starting from when he was about one, he has tallied about 1,500 school days. That is about 3,000 trips counting both directions. Five of those years have been in Spain, making up about 1,750 of those 3,000 trips. Of those 1,750, I estimate that I have walked with him on more than 90% of those days. That comes to about 1,600 walks to or from school with my boy. I would apply an even higher ratio from when we lived in Portland, with me having walked or driven him nearly 95% of the time. Let’s call that another 1,200 legs. I’ve walked him to school or back nearly 2,800 times.

I wrote that a few years ago and can now add a few hundred more to that total even though now he usually walks by himself, not necessarily wanting his folks tagging along.

Yes, That’s Priceless! What Does It Have to Do with Money?

The seven years we lived in Spain and all of those walks to school and other places, were largely possible because I was a stay-at-home dad. Part of the reason I could do that was my wife’s career, but if I had not gotten my finances straightened out years earlier, I wouldn’t have been able to sell my home, pack up a few boxes, move across the ocean, and use savings and investments to fund my portion of the adventure. My wife had a good job in Spain, but she was not making a huge salary, we lived in a spartan apartment, owned a very old car, and kept things really simple financially.

Specifically, but not necessarily in order, this was the path that led to those priceless walks:

  • Get spending under control
  • Use a budget
  • Pay off credit card debt and car loans and never go back
  • Save for a down payment and buy a modest (to say the least) fixer-upper home
  • Rent a room in that home for several years, offsetting expenses and paying down mortgage
  • Begin retirement saving
  • Investing savings and proceeds from home sale to help with Spain expenses and expectation of little to no income for several years

Questions:

  • Could I have still spent the time taking those thousands of walks with my son if I hadn’t gotten my finances in order?
    NO, I would have been working four jobs in order to manage my debt, or I would have been doing a job I hated just for the money and/or I would not have been able to be a full-time dad for those years in Spain.
  • What exactly was the payoff of improved money habits?
    For me, it was the freedom to decide, the power of choice, and the value of time.
  • Was there also some luck involved in all of this?
    YES, but it’s something to see how my luck in these areas increased once I stopped carrying thousands of dollars of debt at 21% interest.

I may not have known exactly what I was working toward when I restarted my financial journey, but one thing I am absolutely certain of is that the path to financial wellness has given me choices and paid dividends—a return on investment —well beyond what any stock, bond, or bank account ever could.

Now, if I can only figure out a way to fix our political system. Let’s see, first…

Among debtors, 60% reported financial stress post-Black Friday, emphasizing the psychological toll of holiday overspending. – Federal Reserve Data

At some point when I lived in Spain I  noticed the emergence of “Black Friday” sales and thought, “What?!” My brain sizzled with a Grinchy stammer, “They don’t have Thanksgiving, they don’t have the day after Thanksgiving… Yes, they have the end-of-year holidays with presents, but no day after Thanksgiving. So, how can they have Black Friday?”

It didn’t take long for me to grasp that it was a standard marketing gimmick, designed to make Spaniards believe they were getting some kind of deal, when all they were really getting was a demonstration of the timeless proverb about how a fool and his euros are soon parted.

Unofficial research done through my various English classes confirmed my suspicion that Spanish people had no idea what “Black Friday” meant in connection to retail shopping; they heard of it but didn’t know where, they assumed it was some kind of American thing tied to Christmas, and they absolutely planned to participate.

The most fascinating thing for me was how Spanish marketers pulled this rabbit out of a hat, slapped a 40% off sign on it, and watched as shoppers jumped. Of course, this was not because they were Spanish — how many Americans drop a chunk of their paycheck every May 5th for reasons they probably can’t explain?

Black Friday Savings: What part of that should be in air quotes?

First of all, let me reaffirm that I am not anti-capitalism, so I don’t have anything against companies doing their part which is to make profits. I’m not sure it’s the best system, but it’s the best we have. I am, however, pro personal finance success, and those two things often work against each other. Right, I’m invoking the Paradox of Thrift; consumer spending is critical to our economic success as a country but controlling our own spending is critical to our individual financial success.

I recommend doing your best to ruin the economy this holiday season, and a key part of that process is to leave Black Friday (and all other gimmicks) behind.

More from the Federal Reserve:

  • 18 million Americans reported using high-interest payday loans to cover Black Friday spending in 2023.
  • Black Friday-related bankruptcies saw a 7% increase year-over-year, with analysts linking the trend to escalating borrowing costs.
  • Late payment fees from BNPL (Buy Now Pay Later) plans during Black Friday totaled $150 million, a 20% jump from 2022.

Staggering. That’s $150 million that didn’t buy anything. $150 million that didn’t go towards retirement plans, wasn’t used to pay off debt, saved for a car, invested for education, etc.

Reject FOMO and Say Goodbye to Black Friday Blues

I like to give gifts. I like to buy things for myself. What I like even more is feeling good before, during, and after spending. The great marketing machine that surrounds us wants us to believe that we have to “get the deal” in order to be happy about what we buy. “Don’t miss this Black Friday deal – up to 40% off” really means “If you don’t get something now and at this price, you will somehow be less happy, you will be missing out, and we hope you didn’t notice that the 40% is often deceiving.”

No judgement, no shame. I have played every role in this play (including waiting in line at 3 am in order to save $50 on a set of speakers), but the one I’ve been playing for many years now has been the most fulfilling. The only things I’ve missed by not participating in Black Friday or any other sales gimmicks are the hole in my budget, the drain on my bank account, and the weight of that bloated January 15th credit card bill.

Practical Tips for Managing Holiday Spending

Leave FOMO behind – this is not easy, and I don’t want to minimize the potential difficulty involved in understanding the psychological connections between FOMO, Black Friday pressure, and our financial health. However, the behavioral piece is one of the biggest factors when reigning in any type of want-based consumption, and if it’s not tackled, other strategies will fall short. To dig into your relationship with money, I recommend a book by Dr. Sarah Newcomb: Loaded: Money, Psychology, and How to Get Ahead without Leaving Your Values Behind. I’ll throw in one of her articles as a bonus.

Budget, budget, budget – work potential purchases into your budget without spending more than you are taking in. Make cuts here to pay for there, etc. If your budget can’t handle it, walk away.

Pay cash and/or only use plastic for budget-friendly buys – this is an extension of the budget comment. Watch out for thoughts like, “Put in on the Visa and pay for it later.”

Research – if you’ve determined that your budget can afford the item and/or that it is a need rather than a want, put that old internet to good use and see if the Black Friday price is actually special. Most research that I’ve seen (as well as my own experience) suggests that prices have a way of creeping up in the weeks leading to Thanksgiving – so 40% off of an inflated price is not really a deal at all.

 *****

It’s a never-ending balancing act. It’s nice to buy things. It’s even nicer to buy things for someone else. It’s nice to receive gifts. I like gifts! But when gifting (and spending in general) leads to financial stress, that’s not a gift for anyone.